Kyle: doing what
i hope not injecting pixie stix like u did during that episode of boy meets world
me: I THOUGHT THEY WERE MADE BY ACTUAL PIXIES
Sent at 12:14 PM on Thursday
me: i can literally feel my heart speeding up
Kyle: whatd u eat/drink
uhh i had two of those peanut butter cookies with the hershey kiss in the middle
love those fucking things
and then a brownie topped with like chocolate chips, marshmallow, sprinkles, and multiple other sources of sugar
Sent at 12:22 PM on Thursday
Kyle: drink some water
relax urself sir
Sent at 12:24 PM on Thursday
me: TELL THE MONGOOSE TO STOP LOOKING AT ME
Sent at 12:30 PM on Thursday
me: lanolin?
maybe don't wear a bra next time
Kyle: oh jesus
warning
me: uhhhhh
no
wait
wait
stoppit
ok go
nope too late
lost your turn
Kyle: we have a sugar induced random conversation overload on our hands here people
me: PUT THE GOPHER IN THE HAMPER
Kyle: please provide 3 liters of water, a can of salted peanuts, and a rabbit wearing a tuxedo immediately
gonna need a couple reinforcements on this one
me: HAS ANYONE SEEN MY SLINKY
Kyle: its worse than i thought
hes calling for the slinky
everyone remembers what happened last time, 600 dollars worth of landscaping damage to the mayors house
hit the sirens
me: BAYER
MAYOR
BEAR
SPRAYER
STAIR
AWARE
BOTTLENOSE
Sent at 12:34 PM on Thursday
me: myyy bologna has a first name it's I M G O N N A M U R D E R E V E R Y D U M P L I N G I S E E
i can't spell
speel
splee
saple
Kyle: hes spelling
thats it
put him down
me: staplesstripes
Kyle: no one else needs to see this
give em the strong tranq
me: dumblecake
what?
what happened
i blacked out
why is everyone screaming at me to put down the helicopter
Kyle: we had to put u down for awhile
u were threatening to go marilyn monroe
me: wow
i didn't mean for it to get out of hand
i mean usually i just go judy garland
and we only have to re-construct the library
don't know what was in those cookies
Kyle: apparently crack
Kyle: apparently crack
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